The candle lighting ceremony is a nice tradition that is a crucial part of many Bar and Bat Mitzvahs. Traditionally, the candles are set on or around your special cake, but many people choose to just set up candles in a cool candelabra, or use chunky pillar candles. Significant people in the life of the guest of honor are introduced and called forward to light one candle. The introductions give a sense of who the person is to the guest of honor – usually the guest of honor will say a few words or read a poem about the significance of their relationship. The Band or DJ will play a special pre-selected song for each candle honoree. Traditionally, there are 14 candles….13 candles signifying the age and a 14th candle for the guest of honor to light for good luck. These days anything goes…..we’ve seen a family blow out with just the immediate family called up to the cake, we’ve seen 3 candles, representing past, present and future (Grandparents representing the child’s past/where they came from, immediate family representing the present, and all the friends called up to light the future candle). If your list of significant people in your child’s life is an 8, go ahead… no one is counting.